Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki
Advertisement
AVGN-_Bad_Game_Cover_Art_-16_-_Treasure_Master_(NES)

AVGN- Bad Game Cover Art -16 - Treasure Master (NES)

("We Wish You a Merry Christmas" plays and ornaments numbered 1-25 are seen on a Christmas tree. A raspberry sound is heard and the cover to Treasure Master appears on the 16 ornament, along with shit.)

The Nerd: Treasure Master for NES.

The Nerd: This is a surreal stream of consciousness that represents sensory overload to the video game-brained kid of the 80's. This is his fantasy. Everything awesome and rad that ever existed all comes to the party.

The Nerd: There's covers where the artist didn't have enough time, but I think this is one instance where the artist might have had too much time. We gotta sell the game! What do we do?

The Nerd: Sharks are popular! P-PUT A FUCKING SHARK ON THERE! How about submarines and spaceships? Y-Y-Yeah! That's good! What about robots? GOTTA HAVE A ROBOT! And a spider on a circuit board? Uh, yeah! Do that! PYRAMIDS! MUSHROOMS! BUBBLES! THE TRANSFORMER'S GRID PATTERN! SPACE! What about treasures? Fuck it! Just have a kid with sunglasses and zebra patches, giving thumbs up, smiling at the consumers, saying "Yeah, you like all this shit!"

The Nerd: The kid is just as happy as the artist! Nobody has ever made such an amazing box art! It's win all the way around! It depicts narcissism!

The Nerd: The kid is lookin' at you like, "Yo, I'm so cool."

The Nerd: He is the treasure master.

The Nerd: Or, perhaps he's calling out to you in desperation, trapped in some kind of floating rectangle, sort of like the General Zod prison thing from Superman 2.

The Nerd: The game was created for a contest by MTV, in which gamers would put in a code, they'd complete the game and then they'd get a number to call in and win prizes, which make sense because this looks like something MTV barfed up.

The Nerd: You know, Castlevania 3 also had a contest; win a trip to Dracula's castle! Yes, Dracula's real castle. I bet that's where kid who won the Treasure Master grand prize ended up - in Dracula's dungeon being tortured for all eternity.

Advertisement